#78 DeMontie Cross

Episode 78 - DeMontie Cross, the head football coach at Lee’s Summit North High School in Missouri. DC was an All-Big 8 safety at the University of Missouri and has gone on to build a coaching career at the highest levels of the game, including college football and the NFL.

DeMontie and i go back to my early days in coaching—when he was a player and I was a young GA—and I’ve seen firsthand the leadership, intensity, and growth that have shaped who he is today. His journey from player to coach is rooted in experience, perspective, and a commitment to developing young men beyond the game.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:03

Hi coaches and athletic directors, it's Corbin Smith with MTTS Sports Group. Let me ask you a quick question. What are the biggest challenges that you face when it comes to leadership development and culture sustainability? At MTTS Sports Group, we have created a system through leadership speaking and training, staff alignment seminars, as well as culture seminars that address those issues. We also offer a six-hour fully immersive leadership stress test for your teams called the Tour Crucible. If you are interested at all, go to www.mttssportsgroup.com and let us know how we can help. Enjoy the podcast. Well, let me go ahead and introduce you, DC. So Damani Cross. Um this is weird for me to, but head football coach, new head football coach at Lee Summit North uh high school in Missouri. It's in Missouri, right? Still in Missouri, yes, it's in Missouri. It's in Kansas City, so it's yeah, they got they got all these. But um congratulations, man.

SPEAKER_02 1:11

Yeah, thank you so much. Uh honored and and glad to one see you and catch up. Uh but uh yeah, I'm just I'm excited for uh the next phase of my coaching journey.

SPEAKER_00 1:25

Good. Well, let me give a little background. So Damani was an all Big 12, Big Eight, before they went Big 12 safety at the University of Missouri. He was a senior my first year as a graduate assistant coach, and um John Hoke was a DB coach, and DC was you were a senior, and I was fresh. I mean, I think we were probably the same. How old are you? I'm 50. How old are you now? 52. Okay, so I'm 53, but we're the same age. So I just graduated, I was a young buck. Damani and I were were really close, and Damani, DC, you were very intense, and uh, I'll tell that story in a second. But I mean, you you your coaching career, I mean, you know, Missouri defensive coordinator, TCU, DC, you coach for the Bills. I mean, you you've kind of done it all. And um you have some kids and and married and living in Kansas City. But I real quick, I want to tell this story, uh, and I'm sure you'll remember it, but first game of the year, we were playing Eastern Michigan, and Mo Anckney was our defensive coordinator. Now, a little backstory Mo Anckney was my dad's best friend. So I had known Coach Anckney since I was probably two or three. And uh, so he was like another father figure to me. So um one of the first times as a GA in the defensive staff room, people were going out. I don't know what we were talking about, but I was over in the corner as a GA and I spoke up, and Mo looked at me and he said, Corby, he said, You just sit there and shut up and don't say a word. You're a GA, you just learn. And I kind of real quickly got put in my place.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:04

But the first game of the year, Eastern Michigan, and some things are going on, and I'm on the field with the headset directly to Mo, who's in the box, and he he's asking me all these questions. You're off on the sidelines, and so I'm asking you, and you're telling me, and you're pissed off, and you know, we're kind of going back and forth, and Mo and finally, and I don't know if you know this, but Mo ripped my ass. Yeah, Corbey, stop talking to him and put him on the damn headset, and then you wouldn't take the headset. And I'm like, Coach, you want put them on the headset. So I finally got you to get on the headset, but yeah, but those were some days, man. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:46

I uh I uh my juices, my juices ran hot back then. Like you said, uh just being the competitive guy was being later in my career, thinking I had it all figured out. Uh I was I was tough to deal with, but for some reason we had a connection and I could I could listen to you uh at times and and and knew you were coming from a good place. And so I think that's where we kind of hit it off at, to be honest with you. Uh but yeah, I was I was I was difficult to deal with because I just felt like I had so much um so much on me to to be successful. And uh I just wanted to be the best in my in my craft and and I took a lot of pride in it.

SPEAKER_00 4:30

Yeah. Um before I get in, because you you said you, you know, and we all did, we all thought we knew it all. Um back when we were young. But um a little bit of background because you're from St. Louis originally. Um and and you know, back then people don't know this. When when my dad got there in '94, you were already there, obviously, um going into your junior year, but um St. Louis in the University of Missouri had this contentious uh I don't want to say relationship, but just there was there was the the area of St. Louis felt like um the University of Missouri, as far as I don't know if it was full athletics, but football really didn't do its due diligence in the community to to keep kids. Yeah. Specifically the the black community for sure. And so I know when my dad got there, like he fought that for the first three or four years. And you were, you know, Don L. Jones, I remember being there too. He was from St. Louis, Ernest Blackwell was from St. Louis, but we didn't have enough guys from St. Louis and that highly recruited area. You grew up in St. Louis. What made you want to go to Missouri? And then did you always know that you were gonna coach?

SPEAKER_02 5:49

I did not, definitely. I definitely didn't know I was gonna coach. Uh, and I was one of those kids who grew up uh being told that Mizzou wasn't a good place for black athletes. Uh that was kind of the mantra of the city on the talk shows. Uh, there were different uh people who would would would put that image and message out there. And so, you know, being a um a young kid, no male figures, no dad, no, nobody like that to really coach you up on what those things meant. You just leaned on the society and the environment. Uh, and so for me, I originally didn't go to Mizzou out of high school. I actually went to the University of Illinois. And so I spent a season there. And then I was like, okay, this is not working out over here, transferred back with the old staff, which was Bob Stowe. And so I'm thinking, okay, I'm I'm back where I need to be. Because I was, it came down to Missoula in Illinois. Well, go through that season, Bob Stowe gets fired, and here comes Larry Smith, and I'm like, man, this ain't gonna work. Like, I didn't even know him. I didn't know anybody, I just knew to have a third coach in two years. I just didn't feel good about it. Uh, and so I struggled my first couple years. Now I struggled my first uh few months because I just didn't feel like I was getting a fair shot. Uh and I think knowing what I know now in coaching, all things being equal, you're gonna give the older senior type players the first opportunity to play. And we had some seniors that were okay players, but I didn't think they were better than me. Uh, and so I just had to be patient, wait my turn, and that was difficult for me. But uh speaking of your your dad, Coach Smith, I mean, he was the only man in that two and a half, three-year bout that actually was able to grab my attention because uh I was just anti-males, I didn't want anything to do with them. I felt like everybody was a liar, I didn't trust anybody. And Larry was probably the first person that just looked me in the face and said, hey, like, calm down. Like, I'm not against you. And and give me a chance. And I think that was the first snippet of me letting my guard down. And from that point on, I had a special bond with Coach. And and it just it propelled me to my manhood and to my growth. And without him, I'm being honest, I just don't know where I would be. I think he was the first male figure to reach me at an age where I was between those 18 to 20, uh, where I was like, okay, maybe I can trust, maybe I can let my guard down a little bit. So that's the backstory on that. And then after my career was over, he was the one that said, hey, you ever think about coaching? And then we could get into that too, but changed my life forever.

SPEAKER_00 8:52

Do you think it helped? Because I, and and I probably, I don't know if you know all this, but when you were there, do you think it helped build a bond with with him because of the fact that he had been at SC. He was extremely close to Willie McGuinness, he was extremely close to Curtis Conway. He was extremely close to, I mean, I remember during the Rodney King riots, um I stayed down on campus with my buddy. I actually went to the beach with him. He brought a suburban down and picked up, picked up Willie, picked up Curtis, picked up Ellic Mahone, Dwight McFadden, who was from Oklahoma, um, you know, uh Lamont Hollandquist, a couple of the kids that grew up where this rioting was happened, and they stayed at his house for, you know, a week. But do you think his ability to connect with you? I mean, did you realize it at the time how how close and instrumental he was in those men's lives, considering they came from a similar background that you did in the culture and that kind of stuff? You you know, at the time, no, but because in St.

SPEAKER_02 10:01

Louis, it was just such a small circle. We didn't know really what was outside our city limits, right? You know, you don't have the exposure that you do now. So I didn't know that until kind of later in my playing career. I'm like, oh, okay, SC. Like, it never hit me when he was hired that he was an SC or an Arizona coach. It never really dawned on me. Uh, I probably knew more about the Arizona trip because of the desert, was it desert storm or swarm? I kind of knew I knew a little more about that than I did all the SC players. But as I got later in my career, playing career, I was like, oh, you know, it kind of hit me like, okay, this guy's a real guy. Um and and then, like I said, just the the personal time that he invested in and didn't allow me to um uh resist or didn't allow me to book, right? He just didn't allow it, and he had patience for me to understand probably why I was so tense or so something. He had the patience, and and that was the difference. He had the patience, and I felt it was genuine and authentic, and it showed well after my playing career.

SPEAKER_00 11:15

Yeah. So how do you how do you translate and and what do you take from your own experience as a player and specifically that situation with a coach? Because I know you were close with with with Hope too, yeah with John. Um and and so how do you take what you learned as a player and implement it as and I know you're a head coach, and and we were talking off air, and I kind of want you to re-reiterate, you know, the fact that you're a new head coach and you've always been an assistant at the highest levels. Um how do you implement what you learned with the kids at, you know, that are anywhere from 14 to 18 years old? Because they're not 18 to 22, and there's a huge difference.

SPEAKER_02 11:57

Huge difference, different time, uh, again, exposure to so many different things that we weren't exposed to back in the day. Uh, I just think a lot of it is the patience part of it. Uh you could still be uh intense to a degree, but I think you have to really reach the players where they are. Uh it's our job not to allow them to stay where they are, but you have to find a way to go reach them where they are and then expose them to what else is out there, what else is possible. Uh, but I think too many times I think coaches don't want to reach kids where they are. I I think uh, you know, especially the higher levels that you go up to, uh, it's more about, hey, I need you to be great now. Uh, I need you to be perfect now. And a lot of times, you know, we have to allow them to fail and fall on their face, but you have to, and again, be willing to reach them where they are. Uh, and I had a situation with a young man, I hadn't been on this job, you know, but for a couple of months, but you know, I was able to um have a conversation with with a young man because he didn't have a ride home after school, after workouts one day. And I just sat there with him till his ride came, and I finally just kind of leaned in and started talking to him. Well, hell, I didn't realize that, you know, because he had been a funny guy for the over the first few weeks. He was a funny guy. And I'm like, this gig, this guy's funny. But after sharing a conversation with him, he he told me he he does that to hide some of the things that he's sad about. Uh brother 24 kill, another brother serving uh time in jail for killing someone, uh, six other siblings uh uh, you know, from from another uh you know set of parents. And, you know, and the he's just felt like the weight of the world is on him. And having not really talked to him or spent that time with, I would have never known that about that young man. I would have just got to know him a little bit. But it's just about, you know, leaning in uh and realizing that it's a lot more than just the X's and O's, wins and losses. Uh and it's about having an impact on young people at every moment that you can. You need to have you need to be of impact. And so I've tried to lead my coaching career in that way uh at all my levels, and uh, and it's been it's blessed me.

SPEAKER_00 14:28

You know, I I I go back and I and I want to ask you, you know, some ways that that you lean in to those kids, and because there's a lot of new head coaches out there and even older head coaches that have been doing it for a while and often forget. But it's so important, and I know, and I've told this story on here many times before, but I know as a young graduate assistant coach, I mean, you called me by my first name, Bo called me by my first name. Um, when I got hired as a tight ends coach, the majority of that room called me by my first name. And then what would happen is these younger kids, these freshmen would come in and they'd hear you guys call me by my first name, and they thought they could call me by my first name. And so I got to the point where I just walked by him when they called, when they'd be like, Hey, Corby, I'd walk by him. And they and I wouldn't say anything, and they finally figured out, okay, this is coach. And the difference for me was that you guys called me by my first name, but when we were on the field or in the meeting room, you you respected me as a GA or as a position coach later on. Um but it was super important, and that was really hard for me because, like you said, I always wanted to lean into every person I ever coached and really get to know them and get to know how they work and how they operate and where they came from and what their history is and what kind of culture they grew up in and all that kind of stuff. So, what are some ways some coaches can can, you know, that you think are important that you're trying to do and that you've told your staff to do to really lean in and and make it more about, you know, wins and losses?

SPEAKER_02 15:59

Yeah. Uh I think first I think it has to come from the other coaches. Uh I try to make sure I address all of my coaches as coach in front of the kids. Uh I just make it a habit. Uh, and then if I hear a coach address a coach by a first name, I try to correct it, even if the coach doesn't. You know, I'm like, hey, hey, that's coach. You know, I just try to make sure that the title of coach still holds the weight that it should always hold. Um, and so I think about, you know, those times, I had to go through it myself, if you recall a little bit, when I became a GA, I was on, I was a GA with all of my teammates. So I never had the separation. I went right into it. So even to harp up on them, like, hey man, you know, I'm coach, you know, that was hard because of the relationships that I had with them being a player and not having any time away from them. And so uh, you know, even though I would, you know, some of those guys could call me DC or some of that, I wouldn't allow those other guys that didn't know me at that level to address me as such. So I just think a lot of it is kind of how you view yourself, uh, and then kind of how the rest of the coaches treat you if you're a younger coach. I just think we have to get back to the bare basic of what a coach is. And it's not just for the show or the posts or the tweets or the Instagrams. It's more about what what I believe a coach should be, and that's a mentor and and and always trying to develop the the person as a whole, not just as an athlete.

SPEAKER_00 17:39

Right. I I mean it's much like it's to me, it was always, you know, now I I I understand how my dad had such a hard time separating being a coach and being a dad, right? Because quite honestly, um as a coach, all your kids are your are your kids, right? All your players are your kids. Absolutely. And as a father, and as a father, it's it's the same way. I mean, we don't treat the players any differently, expectation-wise and standards-wise, than we do our own children. And um you know that that's a hard thing to do, but like you said, that coach allows that distinction of listen, the it comes with weight, it, it, it doesn't define who I am, but you're always you always have to have respect for that word, much like being a father, much like being a father, right? Like I'm not your friend first, I'm your dad first. We can be friends later, I'm your coach first. Uh well, that's good. I I uh again, what what are some things because we kind of talked about this too off air, but uh um you you started to get into how different it was because you've always been an assistant or coordinator. Um and even at the high school at the high school level, like it's being a head coach is like being is being a first-time parent, right? Like people can people try and prepare you for it, but you have we haven't lived it until you've lived it. And so right. So you're in it now um as a head coach, as the the head coach. Yeah. Um, what are you finding are the biggest differences? And and you mentioned you've all you were always kind of protected. Um, what are the things that you didn't expect that that other assistant coaches that are listening can, if they want to be head coaches, can can expect, can prepare for um the best they can. And um what is what are some of the things you're doing to figure it out?

SPEAKER_02 19:38

Well, I I think you know, uh a lot of it for me and my first experience at this thing as a head coach, I tried to lay down expectations uh with parents. We had a parent, had a team meeting, but I had a player meeting first, and then I had a uh a whole meeting with the parents and the kids in the same room, but I wanted to make sure I met the kids first before the parents. Uh but in that meeting, I tried to establish with the group uh expectations, uh, certain things that are non-negotiable. Uh and then probably the number one thing that all parents are concerned about, playing time, right? Everybody wants their kid to be a starter or a powerful player. You know, I try to lay down what those expectations are going to be within my program from a recruiting standpoint, but also from uh, you know, how we treat our players and what we expect our players to be. And even when you lay down those fundamental things, there still is going to be some outliers, right? Uh they still want to have it their way. They used to what the old staff did. Uh you know, you're never doing enough for their kid in recruiting. Uh, and as even with all my years of coaching at the power for level, right, it still goes in one ear and out the other. And uh, and so I I've just had to have a little more patience and try to, again, stick to what I shared with the parents in the first meeting about recruiting, um uh workouts, training, um, all the different, again, recruiting services, seven-on-seven teams, all these different things that um really don't help, in my personal opinion, as far as getting you recruited. It's still about what you put on tape uh uh and what your development is from your, you know, from game to game or season to season. Uh but you still got some people who listen to street agents, recruiting services, and they think they can chase the power for opportunity versus develop their skills to become a powerful player. It's just it's just you know, it's two opposites in the spectrum. So I just had to learn how to be a little more patient. And be willing to engage in some conversations that as an assistant I didn't have to engage in. But it's it's the parents for me. I think the parents uh they're just more involved. Uh there's more investment. And uh I think the expectations are are lopsided with that investment and involvement. It just they're just lopsided, and it's typically not in the athlete's favor.

SPEAKER_01 22:28

Right.

SPEAKER_00 22:29

Well, I think and and we talked about this. I was telling you about the you know, people trying to come at me from recruiting services to try and and I just don't believe in that. When someone promises exposure and evaluation, it's it's not true. And that's why I I I'm doing that the athlete mentorship to be able to work with their high school coaches to be an extension of what you guys are to are are doing and telling them, um, what do you feel like your your biggest role? I talk to parents out there. What is a head high school coach's job when it comes to recruiting? Because I think parents hear it from their coach and they don't believe it because there's so much outside noise and there's so much promise. People are promising all these things that aren't are are just out and out lies. There's seven-on-seven coaches and recruiting services, they're not going to get you recruited. No. So, what what expectations do you lay for the parents? And what should parents expect from their high school coach?

SPEAKER_02 23:27

Well, the expectations that I try to lay out is that the landscape of recruiting has changed. Um, when you start dealing with NIL and the type of money that's involved now, uh most of the not just powerful coaches anymore, most of the coaches now are not taking developmental players. Like when I came out or even 10 years ago, you could take a 6'8 offensive lineman and sign him if he had any ability, any ability, and try to develop him for a couple years and then maybe get two years out of him, right? Maybe. That's not happening anymore. They want someone at the powerful level that's ready-made because they don't have that developmental window anymore. And so I try to lay that out to parents to say that your end goal can still be powerful, but you may have to go to a FCS or you may have to go to uh a junior. You can still get there ultimately, but to think that developmental or just average football players in high school are going to be powerful players, that window and opportunity has shrunk tremendously. So I don't think that parents really grasp that concept because they see Joe Schmo get an opportunity and not look at their kids' development or their kids' measurables or their kids' uh uh a path, right? And and so I just think I try to lay out that expectation and and and say that it's just different. We can end up there, but it just may be a different journey uh for you to get there. So that's one right uh way.

SPEAKER_00 25:13

I just think for Yeah, I I I just I interrupt you real quick because I know you know when you and I were at the college level, and and even I mean you were you were doing it a lot longer than I was um in more more way more recently, but you know, it used to be where if you had 25 scholars, the max scholarships you could give a year at a Division I school was 25. Yes. And that didn't always mean that you had 25 to give. Some years you'd have 22, 23. But 90% of those scholarships were be were being given to um high school kids. Yes. Right? I mean, you would take a transfer, you take a JUCO kid, maybe a couple. It was, you know, it was between 80 and 90 percent were being given to high school kids. So that equates to 22, you know, anywhere from 20 to 22 kids out of 25 were going to high schools. And now that's down to six, seven, or eight that are going to high school. And like you said, those those six, seven, or eight aren't developmental kids. They're kids that that they can plug and play right now, or or at least be a backup right now. And so I I know the last couple of years of coaching, I would tell parents all the time, and and when I met with them, when I'd have our our parent meeting individually, whatever, and I tell the kids, like, if if you want to go play, if you want to play at the FBS level, I'm telling you right now that are you good enough, in my opinion? Yes. Are you gonna get got right now? No. Because of that scenario, right? And so what you need to do is, and I hate, I hate, I mean, we were both transfers, right? In college. And we had to sit out our year. Yes, and I hate, I hate to use it, but it's like you said, times have changed. So if a kid wants to play at a certain level and they're not gonna get there, don't get frustrated, just go to a division two or a division, or even an NAIA, get film and then enter the transfer portal because that's where everybody's recruiting. Yeah. And it sucks. And uh, you know, I I hope I came out a couple months ago before Tupperville put that whole thing in motion, or Sabin or whoever with with the president. But um, I hope they stick to that. Five, you got five years to play, five years you can transfer one time at no cost, but after that, because that's the way it should be. Because yeah, you know, the NIL is gonna be there, but it takes away the reason for transferring. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:41

Absolutely. And and and I just think, you know, that we need to get some parameters around. Everybody's kind of saying the same thing. I just, you know, for the sake of the game, for the sake of coaching, because again, coaches are making hasty decisions, and there's just no time to really be a football coach anymore. You're a a free agent sign-in recruiter, uh, you know, trying to gel a team in eight months to get ready for a season, and it's a new team every year. It just doesn't, it doesn't bowl well on the profession. It doesn't help the young men as far as having to be resilient and and learn how to deal with it verse. It just doesn't help. Yes, put money in the pockets, but it's not helping the development of young people. No way.

SPEAKER_00 28:29

And it does and it and it directly affects your culture as a college program because, like we've talked about on here before, like that's that it's it's gone from building a culture and the older guys telling the younger guys, hey, this is how we do it here, that's not what we do, to it being an instant culture where there aren't a whole lot of older guys to do that anymore. So you're as a coach, you don't even know it, but you're constantly trying to reinforce that. I mean, we have a mutual friend, um, a a couple of them, and and a guy that that you worked for um was coaching at at an SEC school, and he was a coordinator, and then he became a head coach, which he is now. And he told me one time, he said he'd go in the locker room and he spent the majority of his time managing players. Players saying they're not gonna practice because they're getting paid $500,000 a year and they don't want to get hurt. Arguments going on, putting fires out all the time in the locker room. Yeah. And that's happening a lot, man.

SPEAKER_02 29:28

Yeah. It it it's it's a little toxic, and I think again, uh it affects chemistry. I don't care who you are. Uh, when you know Joe Schmoe's making X amount of bucks and you're competing, you're showing up every day, and they're not, and or they may not be good enough to earn those dollars, it it affects team chemistry. I don't care who you are. So there's a lot of different things that are that that coaches are juggling at all the levels, uh, in my opinion. And so, you know, extra special shout out to those who can get a team to bond in those short periods of time to compete uh as a team because it's it's just difficult.

SPEAKER_00 30:10

Yeah, so how important, well, I know how important it is, but but talking about culture, um, you know, it doesn't matter when you come in as a as a head coach. I mean, things are going to be done your way, right? And there can be some great things culturally that were in place that you may change or adjust or adapt. Um, and then there can be, and I've been in a situation where I walked in and there was no culture, or the culture was it was the culture was there was no culture. Um, and so you build it from the ground up and and you may implement some good things that that was in the lack of culture. But how how how um imperative is it for you to and and what have you guys been doing to really create a culture that you want and that your assistant coaches want, the benefits, the kids, the school, the community?

SPEAKER_02 30:58

Yeah. Um, one thing is just showing up. You know, you gotta show up. Um, be consistent in in your message and your delivery. Um, you know, for for us, these kids that I'm coaching now, I'm their third coach in the last two and a half years. And so, you know, you're just trying to make sure you show up, you be consistent in in what you're asking them to do. Uh accountability is one of the things that we're we're stressing. Um they had the culture where uh I was told um that, you know, kids wouldn't show up to practice, or they'll show up late to practice, or uh they didn't have, you know, certain things that they would do that they felt would help them be, you know, conducive to a winning culture. So when those things are all from the top, uh they're just they're watching you and they're watching your message. And are you going to be disciplined with with the things you say? Hey, here's what we stand for now. Uh and so I I've had some guys that are my leaders show up and say, man, coach, we we really like where we're going. So I try to listen to them. Uh, yeah, I know what I want, but I try to lean into those guys that uh have been the leaders and say, you know, how is this compared to the way you used to do it? Or what do you think about this? So I don't just think everything works that I want to work or that I want to implement. I ask for a little bit of feedback from those guys that have earned a little bit of trust for me as far as showing up consistently and working hard and taking coaching. Um, but same applies to the coaches, right? I I kept some guys uh on staff because I don't come from the high school rank, so I don't know a lot of coaches to hire this year, but I kept a few guys uh and so they were part of that culture, right? That was kind of uh toxic, where there was arguing and infighting and all this. But I say, hey, I think these guys did a fairly good job of holding the team together in the absence of a head coach. And so I felt like, hey, you know what? I'm gonna give these couple guys a shot, a shot uh to be on my staff. Even with these guys, there's still some things that they're used to that I've had to try to talk to them about and that I've tried to help bring them along with. And we're still working through those things. Uh, but it's amazing that again, what certain coaches think is coaching is so far from what I identify as a coach. And again, I know I've been at a higher level of coaching, but I also try to make sure that I'm responsible for their development as coaches and their organization as coaches. So I try to coach my coaches, is what I'm saying, because it's not just about me. I think if if if I'm doing the job right, I should be growing my coaches and making them better coaches just like I am the players.

SPEAKER_00 33:57

So, um, and and obviously that's I mean, the people that we that that we grew up around that that kind of framed um our coaching principles and philosophy and stuff like that. Um I know the the really good people that I was always around aligned the staff, right? We were always in alignment, and I think at that the college and the pro level, you can sit in a staff room and argue and and quite honestly MF each other and and but then when you walk out, you you're good. You guys are good. It was a professional disagreement, whatever. Um, but at the high school level, it tends to be a lot harder because um the egos are different. They're not they're not better, they're not worse, they're they're just different, right? Yeah, and like you said, a lot of high school coaches don't have the experience that you have, that I had. And so their mindset isn't the same. And that's not wrong, right or wrong, it's just different. So um, and and the and the other thing, and I think you'll agree with this, the best coaches we were around empowered their assistant coaches, but they empowered them because we all spoke the same language, um, and we were aligned as a staff. So, you know, how how do you bring in a bunch of guys, guys from a previous staff, your own guys, and make sure that you empower those coaches and make sure that number one, first and foremost, they're aligned. They have to be aligned in order to be empowered. So, how how are what are some things you think are important to do with with your staff in that regard?

SPEAKER_02 35:31

Communication. I communicate. You know, I I was a I was of the the mindset growing up that if you communicate things with me, I can handle it, I can deal with it. But there's nothing worse than, you know, nonverbals or assuming like, no, no, no. I try not to operate in the gray, I stay out of the gray, I communicate with my coaches. I talk to them about expectations. Think, like you said, the alignment thing is been critical. All the staffs, most of the staffs I've been on, that's been really good and helpful uh from an alignment. I think I can only recall of maybe one that really jumps out at me where we weren't aligned. Uh and that was a bad experience for me. Bad. Or two, I say two. Those two were probably the worst experiences I had because, again, the alignment was off. You had different agendas, you had uh people going for certain things that they felt was bigger than the team. So I say all that to say for me now, I just make sure I over-communicate my expectations uh of what I expect from them uh as coaches, as mentors. Um I got a staff meeting tonight to go a little bit more into some of those details with my guys. Um but I oh, I here's a point I wanted to make. You know, you talked about empowering. Uh Coach Agney, if you recall, when I was a GA, he gave me a position to coach. To coach. I was a Sam linebacker coach. So I coached one guy. That did wonders for me. I mean wonders uh as a as a young coach getting into a profession where you don't know anything about it or position that you played. So I took, I had a meeting room that he let me meet with them. I had things that I learned from John where I was able to put together uh uh uh practice plans and individual drills and you know leaned on Ricky for certain things from a linebacker standpoint. So that was empowering because now the guys didn't feel like I was a paper pusher or just a guy who's getting the scripts together. So I try to make sure that I give coaches responsibility. Hey, you got my strength and condition. I oversee these things, but I try to give them certain things that I hold them responsible for and try to help guide them along. Hey, if you could maybe do this a little bit better or trim the fat here, or you know, so I try to help, but I want to give them responsibility so it's not just my voice that they move to.

SPEAKER_00 38:11

Right. Well, that's good, man. Uh, we could go on and on. I I think I'm I'm gonna end, DC, on um, you know, uh leadership is so important, right? And and every kid is a leader, um, whether they uh know it or not, or even embrace it or not. And I think, especially with the younger kids at the high school level, the embracing part of being a leader is is very difficult because you got guys that think they're leaders that all they do is talk and aren't leaders because no one listens to them because they're not they're not treating others the right way. And so um, how do you identify, how have you identified your leaders thus far? Interesting uh observation, again, I didn't know any of them, right?

SPEAKER_02 38:58

So you have to observe those that are showing up uh ahead of time, right? Those that are staying after, those that are are really uh out front uh and just doing it by example because you're right, you could be fooled by the vocal leaders, right? That that you know could sway you one way or the other. But uh just being observant uh with time and then having meetings with certain kids and and watching how they conduct themselves. And so I've had a couple guys that have been leaders like we want by example, right? But now those leaders by example are now starting to lead with their vocals as well. And they're holding kids accountable to a skipping reps in a lift or not pushing themselves and not straining like they should. And so those are the guys that have started to separate themselves over the past couple months for me, um, that I know I call I go to them now and say, hey, what do you think about this? Or, you know, I got these three things I'm thinking about for our mantra or our model for the season. So I'm giving them some ownership, but I'm also leaning on them to say, hey, you know, this guy hadn't been showing up, you may want to check in on, right? And so just finding, you know, different things that I, you know, didn't have as a player at times, right? I I was more of the example guy than the rah-rah guy. Uh, I was gonna show you, I was a leader by how I played. And when I was able to go out there and do that, I felt like that was enough. But knowing what I know now, I wish I was more of a vocal guy because guys leaned on my ability to get out there and compete at a high level. And so I think it's okay to you know push those guys that may not be the vocal guys, that that all your guys who are doing all the things right, but may be afraid to step out of that shell. I try to help support that and and let them know it's okay.

SPEAKER_00 40:57

Well, don't I I'm just gonna tell you from first hand experience, your leadership abilities and the way you led um far exceeded what you're saying here. I'll tell you that. I I the thing I I remember about you is you're right. You you had the mindset of I'm gonna lead by the way that I play and my intensity and all that kind of stuff, which it absolutely did. But DC, when you said something, you should have seen people straight. I mean, you you had no idea, but people straightened up. Yeah, yeah. They they straightened and that includes that includes Bo.

SPEAKER_01 41:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:35

You know, who who was that underskilled safety with you back there. Yeah. And was a leader, but diff completely different because when you spoke, which you did at the right times. Right, right. People straightened up and and they listened, you know.

SPEAKER_02 41:55

Um defer sometimes, you know, because of older guys and and not being, you know, so like you said, I I wish and understood that better the way I do now. Uh, but thank you for that. Because yeah, you just don't know sometime, man. And I didn't notice it. I just knew I felt like if I needed to say something, I was to a point where I I didn't want it anymore. Like, I'm giving everything I got. Why you slacking? Or why we slacking? Why aren't we all united in what we're trying to do? And so um, yeah, that's that's so cool to hear, man, because I never I just didn't know. I knew I was liked by many and not liked by many, but I knew when it came to football, there was nobody that was gonna really outwork a play me when we got between the lines. That was my mind setting.

SPEAKER_00 42:45

Well, I'll and and the last thing I'll say is that those younger guys that I think came in your senior year, Harold Percy, Kaldronoff Easter, both of those guys were the two starting safeties for us for a long time, three or four years. And had it not been for you, they wouldn't have, and and if I if they were on here and we asked them, yeah, they would admit to them. They were both Kaldernoff was great, and they were they and HP was great and they were different.

SPEAKER_01 43:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 43:17

But having those two guys in the back end and learning from you and watching you do it the way you did it, yeah. Um, you you you did exactly what leaders are supposed to do.

SPEAKER_02 43:29

So I felt that it's so cool cool because I felt that in watching them and talking, and they shared those things with me. And uh, and so I knew, you know, I may have been a little late, but I was right on time from a leadership standpoint, especially by what I left uh to the staff and and to Mizzou with those guys coming in behind me. So I do know that that's when I did recognize it as a coach and watching them be able to play. I was like, yeah, I I I I did it right. I I I may have been late, but I did it right, you know.

SPEAKER_00 44:03

Hey, brother, I appreciate it. Um love you lots, miss you. Um we'll we'll uh just hang on for a sec, but thank you very much.

SPEAKER_02 44:13

And Cold Love you too, man. Appreciate you and support you in all you're doing. Uh you will make a difference. I'm I'm like you. It's not a matter of uh uh uh uh if it's when. So I support you. Can't wait to see it all happen.

SPEAKER_00 44:26

Lee Summit North High School, Kansas City, Missouri. Now I can't go. You're gonna do great things, but just hang on a second, okay? Okay, thanks, DC. Yep.